Because I Have Been Given Much I, Too, Must Give!

About 8:45 last night I decided I wanted to get a new "feelz good" movie to watch this evening. And you know, Saturday is that special day, its the day we get ready for SUNDAY! Deseret Books is about 1/2 mile where I now reside. Typically I would walk since it's so close but it was about to close do I drove. I parked the car and instead of grabbing my purse I just grabbed my bank card and headed for the store.

I rush into the place and I'm looking at the different movies... they some I already have, some I'll never touch, some that are stale and cheesy but make for good teaching moments, Biographies of the prophets and apostles and such. Anyway after browsing around for 15 minutes the voice over head on the speaker announced "DESERET BOOKS IS NOW CLOSED, PLEASE TAKE YOUR PURCHASES TO THE FRONT!"
I grabbed my DVD's and headed toward the cashier. There was a couple in front of me who needed this changed on their account and wanted to pay 1/2 with this payment and 1/2 with another payment, then they wanted to add their bonus reward points, and please bubble wrap this item so it doesn't break and OH she had to run back and get this thing she forgot and I'm sure you get the point.
(This is also one of those establishments where if you purchase so much you also stack that many points and 1 point is equal to the 1$ so if you purchase a 10$ item you get $10 in credit points to spend like cash. THey give double points sometimes and bonus points and so on.)
Being a professional Customer Service Agent, I stood patiently and kind of chuckled inside. I think my profession has made me more tolerant and patient than the average person about these things. I work with this kind of person ALL DAY EVERY DAY. Good thing because when it was my turn at the cash register, I had to go through some of the same things.
My Purchase came to about 44$ She asked if I were in the "rewards program" I told her I was. I gave her my ph# and she couldn't find me in the system. I gave her a new my cell # and it wasnt on that either. I gave her and old # and it was there. I asked her if she could change the ph# to my cell phone because I had requested it be connected with the cell # on a previous visit. She mentioned it takes a couple weeks for the change. I mentioned the change was requested over a year ago. She took down the info.
"Would you like to use your reward points?" She asked.
"How many do I have?" I asked.
"You have $41 in reward points. You can use them on this purchase or continue to build them up."
Since Im in a situation where I need to be saving $$ these next few months I told her I would like to use them. She recalculated my order and
"your purchase comes to $3.99"
"wow you all are breaking me!"
I smiled and reached in my pocket for my bank card.

I pulled it out and went to swipe it, only to recognize it was my aaa insurance card.
"AUGH! I am SO sorry, I'll need to run out to the parking lot and get my other card."

The guy waiting behind me said, "or you can just let me go first and use my rewards points toward your purchase."
I thanked him and allowed him to go first while I ran out to my car to get my bank card. When I returned they were still ringing up the Gentleman's purchase. He and his friends were in SLC visiting from the UK. As they rang up his purchase He and his friend began talking about what a wonderful time they had in SLC.
The Cashier gave the gentleman his total, and after paying for it, he said... "I'd like to give her (pointing to me) the balance of my reward points!" I smiled and thanked him. The guy behind me said... "now do you all know each other or did you just meet?"
I looked at him and said... "oh we've known each other for YEARS!" The gentleman
who gifted me the points winked at the guy behind us and said.. "But don't tell my wife!" and his friend commented "what happens in SLC stays in Salt Lake City." The 3 of us laughed and the guy behind us looked confused which made us laugh even more. I then explained to the guy behind us... " He's my brother. We're ALL brothers and sisters right?" He smiled nervously... but I think he was beginning to catch on.
I thanked the other Gentleman again as he and his friend walked out of the store and turned my attention back to the Cashier.

The cashier looks at me and said....
" Ok so you now have $59 in reward points and that means you own nothing. So here's your receipt and have a good night!" I looked at her a little shocked. Not only was my purchase "free" because I had been saving my credit, I had accumulated an extra $14 for my next purchase or to save until I wanted to spend them.
"AWESOME!"
I picked up my purchase, Smiled at the man behind me,looked back at the cashier and said... " I'd like to give the balance of my credit points... to my brother right here!" Patted the shoulder of the guy behind me, winked, and headed out of the store.
I turned around looked and the guy behind me who now had a look of confusion on his face yelled 'Have a great night!" and headed home.

I'm not sure about your all, but for whatever reason, I am gifted many things. I'm very blessed. Things like this happen to me on a regular basis. When I mean regular it's almost as if I expect the blessings. What I love MOST about receiving a blessing, is the look on the faces of those I am fortunate enough to pass blessings to. That show 20 minute exchange in the Store made my whole day. And it was already a great day anyway.
I love these examples of how simple acts of kindness and enrich the lives of others. This testifies to me that where much is given, much is required, and to share blessings with others brings more to yourself.
I believe the Lord continues to give to those who will share and give to others.

Think about that next time you are blessed. I must confess when the movie "Pay It Forward" came out and people were raving about it, I was one who was saying... "whats the big deal, my family does that kind of thing on a regular basis." Then it occurred to me that the majority of that the world doesn't think or act that way.
Love is Reciprocal. Love between ourselves and God, Love between ourselves and a family & friends, love of all mankind.
It's that love of all mankind we forget about. And if we look at what mankind has evolved to, we see the lack of love for one another.

What would you have done in my situation last night? Would you have kept the reward for yourself or shared it?

After all, we're ALL brothers and sisters, right?

MY THOUGHTS ON KANYE WEST...!

***get the picture???***
(NOW! I've worthwhile things to think about)

An FYI To My Typical Mormon Brothers & Sisters:

Now that I have your attention, let me just share a few things with you that you may not understand.
Black folks talk to God. Oh I know we all do, I believe, for the most part, we all call it prayer. We talk to him through prayer.

BUT... we also talk to him out loud. We have conversations with him. We express feelings to him. We please with him. And yes, sometimes we even debate with him. It's not weird to us to speak his name out loud and communicate with him as if he is right next to us. We do it while shopping, exercising, crying, laughing, doing laundry, cooking... you name it... we talk to him whenever we feel the need. Maybe it's a cultural thing?
Our mama's do it. Our Grandmama's and Great-grandmama's did it. They did it in the Cotton and tobacco fields. They did it in the Massa's house. They did it behind is back and under his roof and out loud and in their own homes. If I'm to believe he is with me always, why wouldn't I audibly burst out in conversation with someone who is with me?
I bring this up because it is not strange for me to start a conversation with "I was chatting with God the other day about so-and-so, and he told me...."

Or.... "I was about to do such-and-such, but God told me to close my mouth, sit down and be still instead..."

I have seen the raised eyebrows and questionable looks. I don't mind them because I know the heavens are opened. I know the Lord communicates through his Son, Jesus Christ, through his prophets and apostles, and through us, his children. I can feel his spirit with me so distinctly when that communication comes from the Lord. And it NEVER fails me. There have been times it has saved my life and the lives of those around me. I have learned not to question it and to obey it. Sometimes it is an Audible voice. So much so that I will turn and see who is speaking to me. Other times it is a thought, impression or feeling from within that leaves me no doubt or fear and an urgency to heed it's command.

What I have learned from talking to the Lord is that he wants me to communicate back. When I don't understand, I ask questions. Sometimes I joke and laugh. I figure he's given me my personality, he knows me, he expects me to be me. I also realized that my communication with him is for MY sake, not his. I have an obligation to come to him, confront him, ask for clerification and understanding. He knows when I am ready, willing and able to seek out his will. However how vain would it be for me to expect HIM to come to ME and grant me knowledge and understanding.

It disturbs me when I hear people say.... "Well God hasn't revealed to me any such things" My first response is.... "Well have you asked of him??" Someone once had the arrogance to say... "well he's revealed so many other things to me I'm SURE he would have let that be known if it were true." You go right on ahead and think that. We have an obligation to COME UNTO JESUS.
In past postings I've done this. I used to have a little sign on my bedroom door:

A.S.K
(Ask. Seek. Know)

How arrogant and selfish of us who expect knowledge to be dropped upon us without seeking out the answers for ourselves. The Lord knows us well. We do not speak to him for his benefit. We do not sit on our skimpy knowledge of him, the world and heaven and expect to know All there is to know of him just through reading the scriptures. Our journey as mortal beings is a life long education. The scriptures are our text book. I have been to many educational classes in which the textbook was given out for instruction. However, it is when I indulge in the lecture from the professors where I get the deepest understanding, those intricate details, and a deeper more clear meaning and knowledge.

I believe the Lord expects us to ask questions. I believe he expects us to speak to him formally and non-formally. If I am to believe he is my father, which he is, should I not be expected to speak to him as such. Just to be clear, I do believe in formal, proper prayer. I also believe there are times when the conversation comes out how it comes out and it is just as valid.
As I sat listening to my grandmother talking when I was in Michigan...it wasn't just jibberish. Everyone once again she would say... "Lord, have mercy on me." Some people would say this was using the Lord's name in vain. I have heard many times... " Oh, my God." I have seen the circumstances in which the phrase was used. Many times it was a plea for patience, help, security, strength. There may not have been a folding of arms or a kneeling but it was indeed a communication with the Lord.
There have been times when it's used as an expression and not a communication. This is what I believe to be in vain. I guess intent is how it's defined. And sometimes we are BAD at defining intent.

So if you see me walking down the street or sitting alone talking and you don't see anyone around me. TRUST ME, SOMEONE IS THERE!

Family Reunion II: The Time Spent Together is What Matters Most!

You know that commercial we have.... "FAMILY. It's about...TIME!"
Family really is about making the time to be together. I think I mentioned in the earlier post that my Grandma is bed ridden. I think it's been of April. I couldn't believe it because when I was back home back in August she was up and about. She had some dementia and wasn't really sure who everyone was but health wise, she was strong and functioned ok. She did need supervision. So when I heard she was bed riddin I was shocked to say the least. My Uncle lives with her and takes care of her. He's with her pretty much 24/7. It must be hard on him because he gets very relief of getting out of the house.
My Grandma has 5 kids. all live within a 20 min radius. 3 live within a 3-5 mile radius. With too busy lives it appears she's not getting the loving care she could and should be getting from family. This breaks my heart. 1 mama can take care of 5 kids, yet 5 kids struggle to take care of 1 mama. Oh I have huge feelings of guilt living here in Utah while they're in Michigan. I have 2 cousins who go an visit and help now and then,when they can. For the most part...as a whole, WE the family could be doing better.
I feel for my Uncle. His life is basically keeping track of and making sure Grandma is taken care of. I think Grandma knows and recognizes him best. He's got health issues of his own but for the most part I think being cooped up and not having decent conversation is what puts a toll on him.

My sister and I sent alot of time with Grandma. While we were there we fed her, changed her, dressed her bed sores and just spent time talking to her and listening to her talk. Grandma still has alot to say. Some of it... is just talk. Alot of it....is on point. Most of it... HILARIOUS. I was able to get some video of her in her new state.
I appreciate the fact that she talks about the man standing in her room that the rest of us can't see. We're pretty sure it'a "Papa" her husband. He's been gone 35 years. A couple years ago she kept saying her Mama and Daddy were coming to get her. The next day her sister passed away. I have no doubts that she saw them coming. It just wasn't time for them to come and get her. I like that she knows her mama and daddy will be coming for her and she can see glimpses of them. There's been a couple times she would burst out in song. I've never heard my Grandma sing before. this summer and she filled the room with a rich soulful old school gospel melody. The hospital bed she's resigned to lifts and lowers and so do the head and feet. Each time they adjust the bed she's fearful she will fall out so she grabs onto the bars.
The ole girl is STRONG. S.T.R.O.N.G. Sometimes taking 2 of us to pry her hands loose from the bars so we can turn her over. And she is quick. Some of my favorite moments were her telling my sister to get out of her face, or threaten to break her arm or to leave her alone. AWESOME! My sister is a hospice care aide so she took care of alot of her hospice needs while we were there. It was very educational.

I relearned my education about how important it is to have family and be close to family. So much so that I'm seriously thinking of moving back home so I can enjoy them more than every other - every 5 or so years. I really enjoyed my time at home.
I think the most fun I had besides the reunion was hanging out with my Uncle. We really game him a bad rap back in the day. But he's turned out to be the man to step up. We took him with us all over so he could get out of the house. Sunday the night before we left he took my sister, cousin and myself to the cemetery so we can visit Papa's grave as well as some other family members. I think the best time I had was just before we were leaving for the night to head back to the hotel to get ready for our flight home... we did some last minute souvenir shopping. I had my sister go to the Local convenient gas station and stepped inside. I said a little prayer:

"Forgive me Lord for what I'm about to do."
And purchased $30 in instant lotto tickets! I took them back to the house and said... "Ok... we're all gonna split whatever we win." I knew my mom would not approve but being a grown woman she believes in agency. So I was shocked when she used her agency to play as well!
(Now Im not advocating gambling in the least bit. My immediate family are LDS so the cousins, uncles, aunts, grandparents and so forth are not. This was something they did quite often. I don't intend on it being a habit it was just one last bonding moment with our uncle.)

So the 4 of us sat in Grandma's living room floor and scratched off 30 lotto tickets. I think we won about $51.00. So we split that 4 ways. Most of the fun was trying to figure them out. It's not so easy as just scratch and win, there are rules and directions and instructions and such. WE needed a lotto tutor. Figuring them out was more fun than winning. We split the $$ 4 ways!!!

I didn't realize how much I miss the family. I intend on staying in touch with as many of them as I can. And I plan on being at the New York reunion in 2 years and every reunion after.

Family! It IS about TIME.

Welcome to Soul Food Sunday!

(This was from Soul Food Sunday back in April)

It's the first Sunday of the month. In Mormonville across the world it's known as fast Sunday. Fasting is where we sacrifice 2 meals, and don't eat for 24 hours. The money you would have spent on that meal is turned into the church to help those members of the church who are struggling. We also dedicate this time of sacrifice for fervent prayer and meditation to the Lord for special needs we are seeking to have resolved in our lives. It is the one time each month we are asked to have a personal sacrifice for a spiritual blessing. I like to think of it in terms of this....The Lord gives us 7 days. He asks us to put everything aside, worship and remember him and rejuvenate our spirits 1 day out of 7. We usually have 4 Sundays a month. 1 out of 4 of those we are asked to sacrifice and give to the poor. Those are not HUGE sacrifices asked of us. Imagine what the world would be like if it followed this pattern on a regular basis. It's not secret that our Church has one of the best Welfare systems in the world, it's why the Government is constantly taking our state leaders for their cabinets. And there is a stream of city and state governments in and out of Utah looking at how the church sets up it's welfare programs.... How can a church be shipping supplies, foods, clothes etc to disaster victims across the world within 24-48 hours where it takes Red Cross and other national organizations 5-7 days? The system works. It's not based on greed or getting what you can just because you can. It is based on need. You get what you need so others may do the same and you contribute back always.

Another reason Fast Sundays are a big deal is because we go to church for 3 hours.
That's right T H R E E H O U R S! So after fasting for 24 hours and then a 3 hour block of church... U. R HUNGRY!

I'm pretty sure most of Utah Mormonville is having a dinner of Roast beef, funeral potatoes, green be ens, rolls and jello... My house hold is having black food. Not burnt...although that happens sometimes... but soul food. Soul Food Sunday!
I listen to some of the messages from the Black Churches on B.E.T! I put on the Gospel Music XM station and invite The Winans, The Crouches, Mary Mary, Kirk Franklin, Mahalia Jackson and many others to enter and fellowship with Mormon Tabernacle Choir and Saints Voices Unified and a few other LDS Artist.

Dinner will typically be BBQ, Beans and Rice, Fried Chicken or Fish, Greens... NO NOT SALAD GREENS, but collards and mustards and turnip greens. Mac n Cheese or Cheesy grits are regular on the menu. And for sure Cornbread. And we can't forget the Red or Grape kool-ade with way too much sugar and a splash of lemon juice.
Totally makes starving for 24 hours and trying to stay awake for while members step up to the mic and testify of the Lord and the truthfulness of his Gospel that much more worth it!
Now I know some of you are thinking Soul food Sunday sounds like a heart attack on a plate! It certainly would be if this was an everyday menu. These are items I do have through out the month here and there, but not like the indulgence of Soul Food Sunday.
I live in a state where only 5-7% of it is Minority. The rest is pretty Homogenized. When my sister and I moved here we decided to be "pioneers." This place will never learn how to culturally diversify if people of culture and diversity keep leaving. I love that we stayed. I love that sometimes all eyes are on me, because then I can "do my thang." I like breaking the stereotypes and educating people about the black culture and the black history of the United States and even the black history of the church that SO MANY folks are oblivious to. Soul Food Sunday means more to me than Grandma's cooking and a full belly. It's an continuous educational experience for myself and my daughter and it keeps me connected to my family that I'm so far away from. Teaches her how to do the old school cooking and she gets a taste of how things would be if she visited Grandma's house or Aunty's house. I like when I came home from Church today that the house smelled like Grandma's house... Greens and Red beans... mmm mmm mmm! I highly recommend everyone encorporating on a regular basis some sort of cultural event with your family each month. Even if it is just cooking foods from your native origins.
PRAISE THE LORD AND PASS THE FOOD!

FAMILY REUNION: Seeing variations of your face on the body of others!

A few days ago my sister I returned home from the family reunion on my Mother's side: Gamble/Bell/Tisdale Family reunion. We hold it every 2 years and the host city of the reunion changes. This year it was in Albion,MI. In 2011 it will be held in Rochester, NY. In the passed I've only attended when MI was the host state, because I grew up there and it was more convenient to just go home for it. My feelings of that pattern have changed. I am committed to go every 2 years where ever it is and will be setting up a Family reunion fund so I can better save up for it.

This year the family reunion was amazing. I connected with more folks and not just the cousin's aunts and uncles I grew up with. Maybe it's the realization that Ive only got one living grandparent who is waiting to "go home" as she puts it. Anyway the desire to connect has become overwhelmingly strong.
Our Religion stresses the importance of being connected as a family unit through genealogy so of course I've had a portion of the family tree already set up. There's the Family Search website to help us stay connected but that can be somewhat confusing.
At the reunion it was suggested we go to www.myheritage.com . I checked it out and it's a fairly simple program to set up and my mother's side of the family is pretty much established there. I like it.

One of the best parts of a family reunion is seeing so many variations of your own face on the bodies of others! My cousins claim I'm my Grandma's twin. I know I look somewhat like her but I don't think I realized how much until this reunion. Apparently there are VERY strong Resemblances between the "mamas" in my family.
I look exactly like my mom who looks like her mom who looks like her mom. Did you catch that? I also favor and was mistaken for a certain cousin of mine as well. I love it! I'm thinking of getting a tatoo: "If lost, please return to Albion, MI they will know exactly where and with whom I belong!" They might not remember my name but they know I'm Dolores' Daughter, Evelyn's Grand-daughter and Nora's cousin.
I like how the family reunion on this side of the family is set up: The first day is registration where you pay the family dues if you haven't already, and make sure your immediate family's tree is in order. Then you get your itinerary, maps, goodies and Family t-shirt. Then there's bbq with hot dogs, burgers for those who have traveled far. Afterwards folks check into their hotels and relax. In the evening there's the traditional fish fry & pool party.




We also hold the first family prayer:




Day 2 is when we wear our family t-shirts. We take a huge family picture with everyone:


*This is a small portion of the family lining up for the pic.
We hand another huge bbq and went to a park with paddle boats, Kayaking, putt putt golfing and other games. I think my favorite part was playing bing with 2 of my cousins. We each one at least once time.

That evening is the big banquet where we have a catered meal and a Family Unity program: There were words of inspiration, A couple of Unity ceremonies where the oldest members of our 3 family branches each light a separate candle. And after the Unity Prayer 3 different members of each branch take the separate candles and light the 1 big Unity/Family Candle.
There's also the family cake with the 3 family names on it. 1 member from each branch help cut the cake... sort of in the fashion of the wedding couple, except there being 3 people. I participated in both the candle and the cake ceremony.



There's also a talent show. This is also where the family takes a vote as to what city will host the Family reunion next. This year, Salt Lake City was added to the list of Host Cities. My sister and I are the only one's here but if family is willing to come we're willing to host. We are also now on the Hosting committee as reps for our family in this state, keeping everyone updated and making sure dues are being sent in on time. I'm excited. Hopefully in a few year the economy will be such that the family can afford to travel way out west. We're ready for them!

The final day we all gather together and go to church. All the different denominations we are gather in one play and praise the Lord as a family. I LOVE THIS PART OF IT. Because it really does bring home the meaning of family. Being able to put differences aside and gather together is what family... and the Love of God is all about.
I feel sorry for family members who aren't able to do that. Who hold such grudges and turn away. I feel for their inability to love unconditionally. I feel for those family members they missing out on each other. Who make excuses for not sharing in the caring of one another because of whatever justification. I love them. But sometimes attitudes make it hard to miss them. I hope one day they recognize what the Love of Family and God really mean and have a desire to participate.

After church services there was the closing luncheon where we all say our goodbyes to the family who traveled so far away. I met ALOT of new family this year and I'm excited to be in touch with them. I'm excited to be part of the generation who will be heading up the reunion and I'm excited to try and pass on that responsibility to younger members of my family.

After the out of town family left, my sister, uncle, and 2 cousins went to the cemetery to see our Papa! Papa would be my mother's father. He passed away when I was 7 years old. Don't make the mistake of thinking I don't remember him! I feel for the cousins who never had the chance to know him in this life. He and his brothers passed on a heritage that I am very proud to be part of. I gained a new respect for it this year and will always try to bring honor to his name.




I realize part of that honor comes with helping to taking care of his wife, my grandma. She is now bedridden. It's apparent that not too many family members spend much time with her. Her memory is shot and she sees people in the room we can't see and it's hard to understand her.... IF YOU DON'T LISTEN! Which is the key. Her moments of clarity are brilliant. I got some video footage of her and lots of pics.
Some of my family call me her twin.



I kicked my leg up and she said... "girl gimme that leg!" lol

It was a great time! I'm anxious for the next reunion. I'll leave you with more family pics!
In the mean time....love your family, forgive them, gather together often and BE FABULOUS!



Me!


My Mama's senior Picture


My Grandma


My Great-Grandma

That's 4 Generations of the same nose!


The Old Folk watching over the festivities!


Cousins of mine, siblings of each other!



Babies cousins born 2 weeks a part!


My handsome Cousin James Jr.



SISTERS! My mother and her sister with my sister and I behind them

Really Remembering Memorial Day

In the Herriman,UT Cemetery there are 2 generic graves. One is labeled "Indian woman" and the other "Negro Woman." No name, No dates. Just a simply concrete slab depicting their gender and race. Just like every other resting place in that cemetery I don't know who they are, how they lived or how they died so why should I care. I wonder if they lived as anonymously as they died? Did they belong to someone? Servant? Slave? Mother? Sister? Wife? Niece? Obviously daughters. Were they victims of crime? War? Or did they slip out of this life peacefully... or alone?

I'm not sure why it has effected me so. I do have a friend who has a child buried in there, with name, date and usual information. When we visit that resting place we also visit the other two. I guess we've sort of Adopted them. Although today was an easy day to remember them... Today was NOT their day.
This may sound cold and mean hearted. There are 364 days to remember them. However today is Memorial Day.

There's a strange thing that goes on in Utah on Memorial Day. I've never seen it done in other states that I've lived so if it happens where you are let me know.

I recognized one memorial day my step mother getting loads and loads of flower bouquets. I was thinking "how many vet's does she know?" Well it turns out that she was getting bouquet for everyone in the family that passed way. So I guess memorial day for them is in memory of everyone.

I'm not sure if I like or agree with it. On the other hand I guess if you don't feel like paying respect on birthdays, special occasions, other holidays, anniversaries or just because... at least they're visited on 1 day of the year.

Growing up in Michigan Memorial Day was a military holiday. I think I like it that day. Was is not first recognized as a National Day of mourning for those who served our country and paid the ultimate cost for our freedom?

It feels as if this day is just an excuse to pay guilty respects to passed on family members who may be mostly neglected during the year, a free day off work, a reason to picnic and party and the kick off of the summer season. We do all these thing in the name of "tradition" however very few of us recognize how the tradition began.
A little History if you will:

The first memorial day was observed on May 1, 1865 by liberated slaves at the Washington Race Course (today the location of Hampton Park) in Charleston, South Carolina. The site had been used as a temporary Confederate prison camp as well as a mass grave for Union soldiers who died in captivity. The freed slaves disinterred the dead Union soldiers from the mass grave to be inhumed properly reposed with individual graves, built a fence around the graveyard with an entry arch, declaring it a Union graveyard. On May 30, 1868, the freed slaves returned to the graveyard with flowers they had picked from the countryside and decorated the individual gravesites, thereby creating the first Decoration Day. Thousands of freed blacks and Union soldiers paraded from the area, followed by much patriotic singing and a picnic.*

Memorial Day was first called Decoration day. Created by freed blacks & Union Soldiers. In honor of soldier who died for their freedom.

These slaves were set free and upon recognizing the soldiers in a mass grave, they extracted then one by one, respectfully & properly created individual graves for each soldier. Then build a fence around them and an entry arch and created a hollowed place of rest.

They were slaves who could have ran like the wind in fear of being recaptured, beaten or killed. They could have rejoiced in their freedom and been on their merry way. I am impressed at the act of service, love and care they had for those they probably didn't even know. I'm sure it took them a couple years to complete the task, putting their lives on hold to insure a final resting place for those who gave their own life.
This is one of many stories about the first Decoration/Memorial day. The South has their own version. The Government have their own version. Everyone has their own version. Is it any surprise I like this version?

I dare say we've gotten away from knowing the true meaning of Memorial day and I find I'm not alone in this. What I remember most about Memorial day growing up was it was always the first thing we really did as a family after the last day of school. We got dressed, went to the parade. There were lots of soldiers, tanks, military vehicles, flags and bands playing all the patriotic songs and themes of the military. And then we would head over to Bailey park with the family and have a picnic and hear the adults talk about their time in the military. For the most part, we were dressed in Red, white and blue. It think I enjoyed it more as a child. I can remember the park on Van Buren and Washington Ave where the Dairy Queen used to be was planted with red poppies, and some other red, white and blue flowers. I don't believe that poppies or the understanding of poppies are even observed anymore.

Red Poppies for Memorial Day:
"In 1915, inspired by the poem "In Flanders Fields," Moina Michael replied with her own poem:

We cherish too, the Poppy red
That grows on fields where valor led,
It seems to signal to the skies
That blood of heroes never dies.

She then conceived of an idea to wear red poppies on Memorial day in honor of those who died serving the nation during war. She was the first to wear one, and sold poppies to her friends and co-workers with the money going to benefit servicemen in need. Later a Madam Guerin from France was visiting the United States and learned of this new custom started by Ms.Michael and when she returned to France, made artificial red poppies to raise money for war orphaned children and widowed women. This tradition spread to other countries. In 1921, the Franco-American Children's League sold poppies nationally to benefit war orphans of France and Belgium. The League disbanded a year later and Madam Guerin approached the VFW for help. Shortly before Memorial Day in 1922 the VFW became the first veterans' organization to nationally sell poppies. Two years later their "Buddy" Poppy program was selling artificial poppies made by disabled veterans. In 1948 the US Post Office honored Ms Michael for her role in founding the National Poppy movement by issuing a red 3 cent postage stamp with her likeness on it."**

I remember the Poppy Postage stamps always used to surface around this time of year. Where are they now?


"Traditional observance of Memorial day has diminished over the years. Many Americans nowadays have forgotten the meaning and traditions of Memorial Day. At many cemeteries, the graves of the fallen are increasingly ignored, neglected. Most people no longer remember the proper flag etiquette for the day. While there are towns and cities that still hold Memorial Day parades, many have not held a parade in decades. Some people think the day is for honoring any and all dead, and not just those fallen in service to our country...To help re-educate and remind Americans of the true meaning of Memorial Day, the "National Moment of Remembrance" resolution was passed on Dec 2000 which asks that at 3 p.m. local time, for all Americans "To voluntarily and informally observe in their own way a Moment of remembrance and respect, pausing from whatever they are doing for a moment of silence or listening to 'Taps."

The Moment of Remembrance is a step in the right direction to returning the meaning back to the day. What is needed is a full return to the original day of observance. Set aside one day out of the year for the nation to get together to remember, reflect and honor those who have given their all in service to their country."***



I hope those who read this will take it upon themselves to reinstate and educate the true meaning of Memorial Day.

And to those how are still Confused, here is a little Reminder:

Memorial Day: The day you honor and pay respects to all of the fallen soldiers, who died in service of their country.

Armed Forces Day When U.S citizens to come together and thank our military members for their patriotic service in support of our country.

Flag Day The day you show respect and honor for the meaning of the stars and stripes by displaying it.

Independence Day The day we celebrate the history, government, and traditions of the United States.


National POW/MIA Recognition Day National Recognition and memorial for those who are and were Prisoners of war or missing in action.

Veterans Day Honoring American Veterans of all Wars.



Now there are a slew of less known uncelebrated holiday in between such at the birth dates of each military branches and days for military mothers and families.

For the record, were I in charge of this great nation, I would try and instate free medical, clothing, housing, food and education for life for anyone who honorably served in the military for a decent amount of time. I think one of the disgraces of this country is the degradation and dishonor our country has shown those who served in the military. For a people who served our country with their lives, how well are we serving their lives as a country? Many of our Vets are homeless, jobless, have mental health issues, can't provide for themselves or their families. We ought to do a better job at sustaining and more permanent decent way of life for them.

*that's just me* DO YOU HEAR ME OBAMA??? (this is not the opportunity to start baggin on our new president either... remember he's inherited this mess of a country and is already being blamed for it)

Let us always have the desire to look for the true meaning and learn of those things we are privileged to take part of.

(* resource: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Memorial_Day "history")

( **, *** resources: http://www.usmemorialday.org/backgrnd.html)